not perfect

‘not perfect’

What is perfect mean in this perfect world?

I questioned myself what is perfect mean in this perfect world.

Is it a place of immortality or a person without any flaws

But how can you be perfect when they want to trap you in their demon’s claws

Everybody expects perfect you in this perfect world

But here I define, perfect is a freedom of who you are and who you become.

 

“I know I am not perfect and I do mistakes and shit, life is a rollercoaster and sometimes you go up and sometimes down to hell. But it is okay, as long as you breath, you can keep trying, you can keep living and you can keep being you and free in this perfect world”

 

I kept asking myself why I am not perfect in this perfect world

Sometimes I kill myself, sometimes I break my bones

Sometimes I put fake smiles, sometimes I act as a clone

I took hundreds of pills to lose my weight,

I spend thousands on makeup to cover my face

I was just looking perfection in me, maybe I am not perfect at all

Maybe I ll never be a perfect son, a perfect friend and a perfect man

But I love you with this imperfect heart and imperfect self

 

If I am without the flaws and mistakes, and perfect me

pleasing everybody and trying to be someone that’s not surely me

What kind of person I ll be but that perfectly perfect me is someone I don’t wanna see

I am happy young and wild, accepting everything that’s happening to me

In this perfect world, I can be anything, I am perfectly free

I know I am not a perfect man

I wasn’t perfect to you but you know you are perfect to me

But some doesn’t understand and can’t accept imperfect you

I can’t change people but I can bring changes in me

 

I guess accepting my imperfection is a perfect me

I guess facing all my insecurities and flaws is a perfect me

I guess not trying to be perfect is a perfect me

But this world expects more when you give them more

This world is cruel, they want to break you more

They don’t judge by who you are but who you were before

Hate this word ‘perfect’, what it is called

 

But if you are happy with your life, that’s all matter

Just learn not to give a fuck what people says

And I hope you ll never caught up in their fucked up games whatever they plays

Coz I went through so many shits in my life

I did so many mistakes I wish I had a second chance

People judged me and dragged me down so many fucking times

But fuck it, you do mistakes and you learn and you grow

But never do same mistake twice, never just go with the flow

I wish I can say that to my younger self but I am perfectly fine now.

 

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EVIL DESIRE

EVIL DESIRE

Fav I desire In a cloudy weather

As I can act conspicuously inconspicuous

I can literally shed the tears

when the beautiful fog is plastered in my vision

Grinning cheerfully in the wimpy weather

As my soul alter in a darker version

Like it manifested in a malevolent nature

And I can play with a violin tune

seems the string is anxiously tired

It taste bitter and nutty, slightly dull

Like my heart drowning in a black hole

I can’t crawl above or at the bank sides

Like the humankind disbanded me from their kinds

And they ditched me on the ground and buried under the soil

As I am repugnant being they created

As I am ordeal thing they erringly constructed

Their joy on damaging my existence

Scattering my flesh to see a vulture stuffed

Sipping my blood on their senseless victory

Makes me animosity toward their kinds

Wish I can be nightmares of their child

Be the menace they afraid of

Crunch their bones and poison their food

This war of hatred which I want to conclude

By Vaporizing their existence from this nature

Looking back at my adversity I overcome

placing my foot on their chest and

decorating my head with king’s crown

Licking the profound feeling of my guts

Shouting to this dead souls

That  I am The God of this new world.